Sunday, August 14, 2016

What's in My Backpack


I can't be the only one who gets excited over new school supplies. I can't be the only one who finds freshly sharpened pencils aesthetically pleasing. Here's a few of my new school supplies (on a budget).


My only new binder this year. I found it at Ollie's and couldn't pass it up.
I redecorated all my old binders this year. Lots of stick on labels, scrapbook paper, and Pinterest inspiration went into these.

I glued some lace trim onto the edge of my composition notebook to spruce it up.

These pencils and the binder clips were at the $1 rack at Target.

The mini stapler and highlighters were on sale at target, too. Casio scientific calculators are amazing because they do radicals and square roots for you. They save a lot of time. The only thing they don't do is graph.
I'm ready for school.
(Just kidding school already started. The first day was last Thursday cuz I forgot to queue this post for Wednsday. I am so disorganized ahahaha :D)

Into the Woods

It feels forever since I took these pictures. Summer has been hectic, full of funerals and Family Emergencies, long visits, and preparing for a mission trip to Haiti. That's why I'm just now posting. (Ok, to be honest, I'm also watching Doctor Who as fast as I can with my little free time.) I can't seem to get into the habit of blogging regularly. Something always gets in the way.
We spent the week of July the 4th in Watoga State Park, West Virginia. It's all a blur to me, probably because I had my nose in a book for most of it.
Our Cabin
We visited Organ Caves, went hiking and canoeing, toured the home of Pearl S. Buck, and encountered a lovely little black bear when we cooked over the fire one night. :) Here's a few photos.

(OK update something is up with our internet and I can't upload any new pictures right now but here's the ones I uploaded first. *screams at Frontier*)

Café I would have liked to stop by
Le hike
Sleepy Beastie

 A twin. Probably Levi

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Almost But Not Quite

I almost got my pictures from vacation uploaded, but not quite. I'll have to finish that post when I get home next week. My family is leaving for my cousins' house tomorrow, so it will have to wait.

Lately I've been...

- reading. A lot. In the past week I've read Thief Eyes, Little Women, Criss Cross, Landlines, And Then There Were None, Peter Pan, A School for Brides, and Absolutely Truly. I'm working on Goodbye Stranger.

- listening to the "He's a Pirate" score on repeat

- blatantly not practicing my flute

- teaching myself French

- missing my best friend. Oh how I hate distance. I haven't seen her since May because life. It hurts.

- doing tons of laundry. All of my clothes smell vaguely of smoke and swamp from our family vacation in a cabin, and I have to pack to visit my cousins by tomorrow.

- working in my little garden. And by little, I mean four pansies and some seedlings.

Anyway, have a lovely week!

Thursday, July 7, 2016

How to Speak Fangirl

I read a Tumblr post recently about how teenage girls have changed languages throughout history. (I'll try to find it again and link it.) It talked about language structure in teen girls' letters.  Throughout history, letters written by girls my age tended to differ grammatically from letters written by adults. Gradually, the language leaned in that direction. For example, teenage girls started dropping "thee" and using "you." They stopped using "thine" and started using "mine." The rest of the world followed that trend.

Over time, teenage girls were the main reason for languages changing.

That made me think: what if one day the whole English-speaking world starts speaking like fangirls? That's the stuff of nightmares for a grammar Nazi like me, although I tend to let grammar slide when I'm in fangirl mode. Well, should that ever happen, here are a few guidelines for those of you who aren't as learned in that area. xD

1. Drop those capital letters. that's it, you're getting there! baby steps. great job.

2. Grammar doesn't matter. yaaaaaas onc u figur this out ur on ur way to speakin fluent fandom lol

3. Know a few keywords: Here are just a few.
  • angst-- adj. describes a situation or literary piece which contains dark, depressing, angry, and/or brooding emotions from the participating characters; often used to describe fanfiction: the Sherlolly fanfic had too much angst and I couldn't keep reading.
  • as;ldkfja;lkaa;sldfkja;sldkfj-- keyboard slamming is a way of showing one's unbearable emotion, usually expressing overflowing joy or violent sobbing:
  • AU-- n. alternate universe in which a fanfiction is set: That fanfiction where Sherlock is a caveman was totally an AU.
  • canon-- adj. official; truth; known to be a real thing: I will rest in peace when Sherlolly is canon.
  • fanart-- n. art made by a fan: Abbyrose draws some epic Pokémon fanart.
  • fandom-- the community that surrounds a TV show, movie, or book; often includes fanartists, fanfiction writers, cosplayers, bloggers, etc: The Superwholock fandom is insane.
  • fanfiction-- n. a piece of writing created by a fan using someone else's characters: Did you read that new Doctor Who fanfic?
  • feels-- n. overwhelming emotion often expressed through keyboard slamming or high-pitched squeals; often accompanies angsty fanfictions: Omg did you watch that new episode? FEEEEEEELS!
  • headcanon-- n. a personal interpretation of canon typically proposed by a fan; possible scenarios and backstories for the characters that would fit with canon. Lauren, come read my new headcanon where Sherlock had an imaginary friend.
  • No-TP-- n. the opposite of one's OTP; a couple you cannot stand to be shipped: I wish this no-TP trash would stop showing up on my dash.
  • OTP-- n. one true pairing; your favorite (usually romantic) combination of characters: Sherlolly is my OTP.
  • ship-- v. to endorse a romantic relationship: I ship Rose and the Doctor so hard. n. a romantic relationship between two characters or people; an unrealistic pairing that you love so much but it causes you so much pain because it's misery to ship something not canon and all you can do is read fanfiction and look at cute fanart and keyboard slam and clutch at your heart shrieking "FEEELS!" while slowly melting into the ground... sorry.
  • squick-- n. something that makes one feel uncomfortable: Johnlock is a major squick for me.
How many of these words did you already know? Tell me in the comments. More on fangirl vocabulary here.

4. "lol", "yeah", and "like" are punctuation. you don't even understand lol i was just like... yeah

5. Master the keyboard slam. It's a freestyle form of art. Embrace it.

6. Watch the show. No one likes people who pretend like they know what they're talking about. Do your research; read the book before you watch the movie. Join the fandom. Go crazy like the rest of us.


Tuesday, July 5, 2016

5 Things New Tumblr Users Need to Know

I set up a Tumblr blog a few months ago, and there were a few things I wish people had told me before I started.

1. Everyone is crazy. Everyone on Tumblr is obsessed with something: fandoms, politics, fashion, feminism, vegetarianism. They're all very dedicated. Be careful what you post because people can interpret things in a different way than you meant.
2. Porn blogs exist. And they follow you. Yes, I know. Lovely. I've never really been exposed to this kind of thing. This was not something I had a lot of trouble with on Blogger, but on Tumblr it's apparently very common. Imagine innocent me scrolling through my notifications, seeing a new follower, and excitedly clicking on their blog. Imagine the shock at what pops up. Something I did not know: if someone you don't know follows you or shows up in your notifications, make sure you let the profile picture load before you click on their url. Just about all porn blogs have nude profile pics, so look for that. For some reason they don't unfollow you if you don't immediately follow back like with other bots...? I don't know. Just wish I'd been warned.
3. Know what Superwholock is. You don't know? *gasp* Uncultured swine! Superwholock is a giant crossover fandom uniting fangirls (and boys) who watch Supernatural, Doctor Who, and BBC Sherlock. 1 in 3 Tumblr users is part of the Superwholock fandom.* If you want to get to know your Tumblr community, you've got to understand this complex fandom.
4. The mobile app is terrible. It's slow. Pictures don't load. You can't edit your blog. It takes up tons of memory and data. If you're someone who typically only visits social media on your phone, don't get Tumblr. Use the website at all costs. Otherwise you might break your phone throwing it across the room.

5. There is a difference between messaging, asks, and fanmail. I've been on Tumblr since September and I still don't know how to use any of them. The staff keeps making changes to it. I honestly can't help you.
*statistic I made up

Sunday, July 3, 2016

Peach Pie

If you're looking for something to take to a 4th of July party, or you just want something sweet to eat, here is an amazing recipe for peach pie.


You Will Need:

  • 1 c. sugar
  • 3 to 4 T. cornstarch
  • 1 c. water
  • 8 oz. cream cheese
  • 1/4 c. sugar
  • 2 small boxes of Peach Jello
  • 6 to 8 small peaches
  • Graham Cracker crust
  • Cool Whip
Mix one cup of sugar, 3 to 4 tablespoons of cornstarch and 1 cup of water. Let it boil until thickened.
Add two small boxes of peach Jello.

Mix softened cream cheese, mix with 1/4 cup sugar. Put cream cheese mixture in the bottom of graham cracker crust.

Slice peaches over cream cheese mixture. Pour gelatin mixture over top.

Let it sit for at least 3 hours, then top with Cool Whip.

Saturday, July 2, 2016


Last night we went to a friend's house to watch the fireworks in town. This is the first year we've ever not been at the Outer Banks during the first week of July. We had a good time. Lots of food, laughter, blankets, and stars.

I took a few pictures. My camera is broken, so I'm using my dad's old Bloggie camera for now. The quality isn't the best, but I try to edit a little and I think they're okay. What do you think?



Random eerie street light.

My family is leaving for vacation tomorrow, so I've queued a bunch of posts for the next few days. Have a lovely week!

Thursday, June 30, 2016


Meet Bonnie.
Bonnie is my cactus. I just got her a few weeks ago. Isn't she a cutie?
Her little friend is a succulent. I haven't named him yet. He's still a baby; he just sprouted a few weeks ago.
I took a pottery class this spring. That's where I made Bonnie's pot. It's a little lopsided, but I'm learning. Do any of y'all like indoor gardening, too? Tell me in the comments.


Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Not Dead!


Remember me? No? Sorry. That's my fault. But I'm back in the blogosphere! Can't wait to start posting. I apologize for falling off the face of the earth for a little while. Again. I just popped in to say that I am not dead. Cheerio!

--Rebecca xoxox

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Hope Fulfilled.

I heard from Jersey for the first time yesterday. An email from a stranger popped up in my inbox. It took me about 0.5 seconds to deduce that it was her. It was a clever pseudonym, just like her. I read it hungrily, soaking in words. She'd written it in a hurry, probably during school, so it was short. But it was enough; she is okay. Everything is okay.

I've kept tabs on her through friends who have connections with the foster system. They've informed me of every move she made. It didn't seem real, though. Not until today. They weren't lying. That little bud of hope I've kept tucked away is blossoming now. Things will work out.

I haven't done much in the past month. Pray, memorize my history book, sleep. Find patterns in the leak-stained ceiling during class. I was forced to fill out my schedule for my Junior year of high school; that was a nightmare. I had to choose classes and then scribble down a signature, sealing my own fate. Seven AP and dual credit classes, plus marching band. Next year is going to be busy, to say the least. I wish Jersey were here to make memories with in the coming school year.

Anne, MK, and I have bonded over all this. We were the ones it affected the most, and we've grown closer as friends through this trial. So that's a positive thing.

I'm going to attempt blogging this month. Stay tuned. :) Thank you, all of my loyal readers, for sticking around even though I can't seem to get around to posting. I love you guys.

Thursday, January 21, 2016

Of Terrible Timing and Travesty II

Tuesday, January 12, it snowed like crazy. It was cold and icy and several counties in the state were closed. Not ours, though. I refreshed the "closing and dismissal announcements" page more times than I can count. "This must be broken," I muttered. "There's no way we have school today. There has to be at least a delay."


By 7:30 I was at school, curled up with my head on the table in the cafeteria. My friends and I all talked about hoping for an early dismissal. The ones with phones kept checking the website page. Still no.

Jersey shuffled in, headphones on and hair in her face. She sat down at the table beside us, turning the chair to face us. "Don't you hope we get a two-hour early out?" I asked.

"I don't," said MK. "I don't wanna go home."

"Me neither," said Jersey. "Actually, I'm not either way."

"Why, where are you going?" Anne curiously looked up from her phone. Jersey shook her head. "Come on, tell us. Where?"

"Just not home." I saw her hand slip into her baby blue sweatshirt pocket. There was the pouch from yesterday. My breath hitched in my throat.

"No. Don't say that."

"She got it," said Jersey, nodding at me.

"I don't get it," said Anne. "Where are you going?" Jersey just shook her head again. Anne's voice became irritated. "I said, where are you going?"

"Six feet under," mumbled Jersey. Anne's eyes widened. It had clicked. I glanced to see if MK had noticed, but she was turned around talking to our other friends.

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Of Terrible Timing and Travesty

This has been the most emotional week in my life. Waiting in silence, knowing nothing, asking questions and waiting for an answer that never comes. It's only been a few days. I'll give them that. But she's a teenage girl with friends, not some classified government secret.

I'm a storyteller by nature, so I will tell my story. Her story. They were trying to keep this quiet, but one loud mouth has already spread it to the far corners of the community. And I need to tell someone the full story in written words, because every time I've tried to speak it, I break down.

My friend-- as a joke we call her Jersey sometimes, so that's what I'll call her on this blog-- is in the foster system.

Some of you may not know a lot about the American foster system, but you should know that it's messed up. It's basically an unstable prison, punishing minors for living. No contact with former relatives, no social media, no driver's license (because God forbid you might run away), no permanent home. You can't visit a friend's house without a background check and an agent's consent. No freedom. Most older kids never get adopted. A lot of them feel unwanted because of that, because someone adopted their younger sibling but left them on their own. Is it any wonder that a good percentage of these foster kids are depressed?

Jersey is. You can probably guess the rest of the story.

She's one of my best friends. We met at school, gym class. My friends MK and Anne (again, not real names) and I got the privilege of showing her around on her first day. Jersey is jovial and funny. A ray of sunshine, always smiling. But the biggest smiles hide the biggest hurt. I could see through it from the beginning, though maybe it's just from the obsession I had with stories about orphans. I thought I was just romanticizing again, and I pushed it aside.

She stayed at my house one weekend this fall. I learned so much about her that weekend. She told me what I had already guessed, and promised me she had stopped cutting three months previous. I believed it because I wanted to. I didn't want to think about one of my best friends slipping down that jagged cliff. Depression. It's not a pleasant thought to entertain.

On Mondays and Tuesdays we have homeroom. That's the only class Jersey and I share. We sit at the back, talking books and weekend plans. For the past several weeks I had noticed a difference. Her clothes fit her about as well as a tent, and she never asked for food like she used to.  She mentioned being hungry at one point, said something about going down to one of the teacher's rooms who sell food. (Yeah, it's illegal for teachers to sell unapproved food to students during school hours, but it's good money and frequent customers. Hungry kids are good at keeping hush hush.) This Monday, when she said she hadn't eaten the day before, I urged her to go. "Come on. I'll go with you."

"Rebecca, I feel like you're tryin' to make me eat. You're as bad as my foster mom."

"Good. I am trying to get you to eat."

We bought a can of jalapeño Pringles. She ate one willingly; I forced her to eat two more. "Jersey, junk food is better than nothing. You can't keep doing this." She didn't answer. She was digging in her camo backpack, fishing out a blue, hard-shelled pouch. She unzipped it.

"I used to keep my... stuff... in here. Instead of cutting, I've been writing notes," she said. I nodded. Something in my chest twinged. I'd been an idiot to believe she'd stopped. There were two small folded packets in the pouch. She offered one to me. "Tell me what you think." I noticed how thin her hands were. Her thumb joints jutted out like knots on a tree. I took it, carefully unfolding the notepaper.

The words added to the growing apprehension in my chest. "It's..." I couldn't say anything. My intuition had been right all along. " sad, Jersey," I finished lamely. The words danced, jumping into lines they didn't belong in and darting back quickly to their place. I hadn't read them in their exact order, but I knew everything she'd never been able to say out loud. "Pointless. Tired. Useless. Alone. No one cares. I want to stop--" Stop what?

As I was reading, she was opening the other note with fumbling fingers. From the corner of my eye, I saw something small fly out. A metallic ringing filled the air. "What was that?"

"I don't... know." Lies. I knew before I eve laid eyes on it. She snatched something up from the floor by her backpack, but not before I saw.


"I thought I got rid of all of them--"

"Jersey." I held out my hand. "Please give it here." She started to protest, but then looked into my eyes. She stopped. Reluctantly and with a pouting face, she put the offending item in my open palm. I glared at the hateful razor blade. Shiny. Naked. New. So wickedly sharp I was afraid to move for fear of nicking myself.

Before she could change her mind, I shoved it into my sweatshirt pocket. I was thinking. She meant for me to see it. I know she did. Why? And the note. Why?

Any idiot would have gotten help then, but I didn't.

I asked to see the other note. It was worse than the first. The girl in front of me turned around when I said, "Jersey, these are going to make me cry. Why--"

"I feel like I missed something. Did I miss something?" Her voice was nasal and know-it-all. Yes, you did miss something, turn around please. I didn't say that though. I turned to Jersey. I don't remember what I said, but I remember it being cliché and pathetic and not at all comforting like I meant it to be. I hated myself for not being able to say what I wanted to say.

I helped her fold the notes back up again. It took us awhile-- her hands shaking from lack of food, mine from emotion.

I went down to lunch. I sat down by L, slapping the confiscated razor blade down on the table.

"You know who I took that from?"

"I have a guess," She said after a moment.


"Thought so." We were quiet for a while. Neither of us knew what to say. What do you do? I knew she had more. They always do. And you can hurt yourself with almost anything. We couldn't just lock her up in a padded cell.

I went home and locked myself in my room with the internet, as per usual. Thinking. Wondering what approach I should try with Jersey. Something had to be done, I just didn't know what.

(This is going to end up being a two parter because it's getting late.)

Friday, January 1, 2016

Of Antisocial Recluses (Is That a Word?) and New Ideas

Okay. So I've been kind of an antisocial recluse lately. Not just blogging. Emails, letters, phone calls, thank-you notes, social events-- I've been avoiding all of them for some reason. I want to do things... but I don't. With everything. I want to read, but don't. I want to write, but don't. I want to work ahead in my studies, but I don't. I want to socialize, but I don't. I just... can't. Everything has gotten hard lately for some reason. Even talking to my closest friends. I get up and I go through the day with the goal of going back to bed as soon as possible. I come home, I do my work, I curl up on my bed and switch back and forth between the same three apps. Or stare at the ceiling. I say as little as possible to anyone during the day. What is wrong with you, Rebecca, get a grip. I don't know. Also, I now do everything at the last minute, even if it means pulling an all-nighter. You could give me sixty-seven years to study for a test, work on a project, make a gift for someone. I'd still do it the night before.

I'm just so glad I have those awesome friends that I can talk to. Y'all know who you are. Thank you. :) I love you.

So enough blabbering and excuses. What am I posting again?

Oh right. I'm apologizing. I truly am sorry for not blogging or commenting... or responding to communication of any kind, for that matter. I know I've said it before, but I'm hoping to not ever have to say it again. This time I'm sticking to a schedule. I swear. Posts twice a week. Promise. ;)

For this idea... I saw it a while ago on a blog that I can't remember the name of... to improve your writers' discipline, you write at least a page a day for an entire year. It can be a poem, a letter, a journal entry, a story, whatever. (Blog posts don't count though.) But the rules say it has to fill up at least a page. I thought I'd try it this year. Anyone else up for the challenge?

Well I'm off to write my page for the day. Wishing you guys the best year you've ever had in 2016!