How to Speak Fangirl

I read a Tumblr post recently about how teenage girls have changed languages throughout history. (I'll try to find it again and link it.) It talked about language structure in teen girls' letters.  Throughout history, letters written by girls my age tended to differ grammatically from letters written by adults. Gradually, the language leaned in that direction. For example, teenage girls started dropping "thee" and using "you." They stopped using "thine" and started using "mine." The rest of the world followed that trend.

Over time, teenage girls were the main reason for languages changing.

That made me think: what if one day the whole English-speaking world starts speaking like fangirls? That's the stuff of nightmares for a grammar Nazi like me, although I tend to let grammar slide when I'm in fangirl mode. Well, should that ever happen, here are a few guidelines for those of you who aren't as learned in that area. xD

1. Drop those capital letters. that's it, you're getting there! baby steps. great job.

2. Grammar doesn't matter. yaaaaaas onc u figur this out ur on ur way to speakin fluent fandom lol

3. Know a few keywords: Here are just a few.

• angst-- adj. describes a situation or literary piece which contains dark, depressing, angry, and/or brooding emotions from the participating characters; often used to describe fanfiction: the Sherlolly fanfic had too much angst and I couldn't keep reading.
• as;ldkfja;lkaa;sldfkja;sldkfj-- keyboard slamming is a way of showing one's unbearable emotion, usually expressing overflowing joy or violent sobbing:
• AU-- n. alternate universe in which a fanfiction is set: That fanfiction where Sherlock is a caveman was totally an AU.
• canon-- adj. official; truth; known to be a real thing: I will rest in peace when Sherlolly is canon.
• fanart-- n. art made by a fan: Abbyrose draws some epic Pokémon fanart.
• fandom-- the community that surrounds a TV show, movie, or book; often includes fanartists, fanfiction writers, cosplayers, bloggers, etc: The Superwholock fandom is insane.
• fanfiction-- n. a piece of writing created by a fan using someone else's characters: Did you read that new Doctor Who fanfic?
• feels-- n. overwhelming emotion often expressed through keyboard slamming or high-pitched squeals; often accompanies angsty fanfictions: Omg did you watch that new episode? FEEEEEEELS!
• headcanon-- n. a personal interpretation of canon typically proposed by a fan; possible scenarios and backstories for the characters that would fit with canon. Lauren, come read my new headcanon where Sherlock had an imaginary friend.
• No-TP-- n. the opposite of one's OTP; a couple you cannot stand to be shipped: I wish this no-TP trash would stop showing up on my dash.
• OTP-- n. one true pairing; your favorite (usually romantic) combination of characters: Sherlolly is my OTP.
• ship-- v. to endorse a romantic relationship: I ship Rose and the Doctor so hard. n. a romantic relationship between two characters or people; an unrealistic pairing that you love so much but it causes you so much pain because it's misery to ship something not canon and all you can do is read fanfiction and look at cute fanart and keyboard slam and clutch at your heart shrieking "FEEELS!" while slowly melting into the ground... sorry.
• squick-- n. something that makes one feel uncomfortable: Johnlock is a major squick for me.

How many of these words did you already know? Tell me in the comments. More on fangirl vocabulary here.

4. "lol", "yeah", and "like" are punctuation. you don't even understand lol i was just like... yeah

5. Master the keyboard slam. It's a freestyle form of art. Embrace it.

6. Watch the show. No one likes people who pretend like they know what they're talking about. Do your research; read the book before you watch the movie. Join the fandom. Go crazy like the rest of us.